Let me set the scene for you: I'm wearing a cute dress but I had woken up late, so I put it on and left for work without realizing that I haven't shaved me legs in a few days. I get to work and realize I'm all fuzzy and grab the spare razor I keep in my car just in case. I go clock in, do some writing, then go to the 1st floor bathroom where nobody ever goes to shave my legs. I have one leg up on the counter when this happens:
Door opens. In walks a coworker that I've never spoken to but have, admittedly, silently judged because she sometimes wears trampy things to work. Plus she works with the "education advisers" who are really just phone sales people that work in our call center and mostly consist of petty, gossipy former house wives. As I hear the door open I nearly fall over trying to get my leg off the counter.
GIRL: Oh...Hi.
ME: Um....Hi.
(silent beat)
ME: So...I'm shaving my legs...in the bathroom at work. (why I feel the need to state this, I have no idea)
GIRL: You must be planning to have a really good Friday night.
ME: No! I mean...I just didn't shave this morning.
At this point I realize why she's in this no-mans-land bathroom - she has to take a shit. And I still have one leg to go. We proceed to have really awkward conversation while I finish up, and somehow in my effort to be super nice (in part so she wouldn't go telling the whole office that I was shaving on the clock) we end up making a lunch date for today. Fantastic. I don't have time to go out for lunch, let alone go with this girl who caught me shaving in the bathroom bc she wanted to take a dump. What the hell are we supposed to talk about? "So, remember that time you nearly got a full crotch shot of me as I attempted to dismount my leg off the bathroom counter top like a mentally disabled gymnast?"
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